Once A Boy: Be Here Soon

My mom would always tape a 3x5 card to the fridge. On the card was a written list of our bills for the month.  While walking through the kitchen or opening the fridge to steal a hunk of bologna, I often found myself pausing to look over the list.  I was only in the 5th grade so I was just beginning to understand large numbers and how money worked—but I still had no clue as to the amount of work and time it took for my mom to pay for those 2 to 3 digit numbers on the card.  She held down a full-time job, and spent many other hours either employed part-time or fulfilling various sewing or art related requests to support our family.  My mom loved her kids; she grew tired of work, but never grew tired of us.  

So when the time came for me to join the band at school—and buy an instrument (snare drum)—I knew it would be difficult for my mom to afford the extra cost.  But she believed I had the ability to play drums and she wanted to provide the means for me to do so.  Luckily, the music store selling the band instruments offered a monthly payment plan to spread out the cost. So on to the fridge it went: $15/month – Snare Drum. To some people this may have been a drop in the bucket, but this was money that could be used for groceries or gas for the car.   

 We would have band rehearsal on Wednesday afternoons, so that morning my mom would drop me off and I would carry my snare drum (in a big case that weighed almost as much as me) from one end of the school building to my classroom on the other side.  It was heavy and my back ached. When the school day was over, I couldn’t transport my drum on the bus so I had to be picked up from school, which meant I would be waiting a good 30-45 minutes until my mom was available to pick me up.  I would watch as numerous teachers left the building, occasionally one would speak to me asking if I had a ride and then I would have to explain the situation to them. I was extremely shy so I was often embarrassed and awkward as I talked to them. I grew to loathe Wednesdays.

My mom would eventually arrive in a beat up car and greet me with a Hey Kiddo and I would respond in kind, but underneath I was so angry and disappointed in her.  

As we drove home I would steal a glance at my mom.  She was tired.  She spent many hours each day working because she loved her kids.  She worked jobs she disliked to provide opportunities for us to live and grow.  She knew music would become a passion for me, and her sacrificing some time and effort on her part was totally worth it.  

For the rest of the school year, I happily carried that snare drum through the halls, and Wednesday afternoons still found me sitting outside the school, alone, on my drum case. Teachers would stop and ask if I had a ride and I would simply smile and proudly say, “My mom will be here soon.”    

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